By Aneeka Simonis
CHRISTMAS is often dubbed the season of joy – but for some women and children, it’s the season of fear and sadness.
Family violence spikes over the holiday season, and a men’s behavioural change mentor has urged men to think before they act over the Christmas period.
David Nugent, founder of H.E.A.V.Y Metal men’s behavioural change group which operates out of Hallam, said families could be put into pressure cooker situations over the Christmas and New Year break as they spend more time together.
He said expectations often differed between men, women and children – and when they clash, so too can family members.
“Ironically, everyone looks forward to the holiday break, but it can be a very horrible time for families,” he said.
“Men might think, they’ve got time off so they can drink and sleep in, but in the woman’s mind, she thinks her husband will be home so they can spend more time together and time with the kids.
“These perspectives can clash. The man can think ‘give me a break’, and when alcohol is involved and pressure from the family, it can become a horrible time.
“Feedback we have from kids suggests some don’t look forward to Christmas at all.”
Reports of family violence always peak over the Christmas period.
In Cardinia Shire, police responded to 396 family violence incidents from October to December last year, up 8 per cent on the second closest quarter.
The same trend was also observed in 2014.
Police responded to the most family violence incidents in the December quarter compared with other periods.
Tension between family members over the break period can be so bad that it’s become the focus of specific men’s behaviour workshops.
Mr Nugent said men took part in special programs close to the Christmas period.
They highlight the pressures men might face, and how to best deal with them.
“We teach them to be aware of the traps they could fall into and how to make it a great Christmas,” he said.
“Unfortunately, men that are abusive are focused on themselves rather than making it special for everyone else.”
He agreed the best Christmas a child can have is a Christmas free from violence.
If you need help, call the 24/7 Men’s Helpline on 1300 78 99 78 or visit the H.E.A.V.Y Metal men’s behavioural change website at https://www.heavymetalgroup.com.au/.
