The Snowman
Starring: Michael Fassbender, Val Kilmer, Chloe Sevigny
This one was designed to do for snowmen what Stephen King’s “It” did for clowns.
And it must be said, you will find snowmen pretty creepy by the time this film’s finished with you.
So Scandi-noir has become quite the rage in recent years, and this is no exception.
Michael Fassbender stars as the stereotypical brilliant, burnt-out alcoholic cop whose personal life is falling apart but who can spot a perp at 100 paces.
His opponent is The Snowman, a serial killer who puts up creepy snowmen then makes snow bodies with dismembered body parts of his victims.
He or she is triggered when it snows … which, sadly, for the police (and the victims) happens quite a bit in Norway.
And an attack is usually signified by a thrown snowball … I swear I’m not making this up.
You really need to be in the Scandi cold and dark for the full creepiness to assert itself, I guess.
So the upshot of all this is far from ground-breaking but, to be honest, it’s not that bad, and quite possibly the best release of the week … but then I hear good things about Happy Death Day.
Fassbender usually leaves me cold – no pun intended – and this one was no different.
Add Chloe Sevigny and Val Kilmer, and you just know you’re looking at a full-on weirdfest. Kilmer is mumbling, shuffling, unrecognisable and looks like the “after” pic from a Jenny Craig ad.
Only Tilda Swinton would have been needed to completely fill out the weirdness.
The Snowman … he’ll put you on ice.
– Jason Beck
