By Russell Bennett
“We want to have more of these games, but we don’t want them to have to be in memory of anyone.”
They were the simple, heartfelt words from Matt Runnalls as he looked out over the Hampton Park junior footy ground on Sunday at the second ever running of the club’s ‘Legends Game’, which welcomed a host of its favourite sons and daughters back to the fold.
Former players and club people from all walks of life converged on the ground for the game, this year held in memory of former player Shaun Ross who took his own life late last year aged just 22.
The lovable larrikin who’d give the shirt off his own back to anyone in need, made an unforgettable impact on anyone close to him, and thousands across the south east will never quite be the same again. They won’t get to hear his laugh again, or see his smile, or simply confide in one of life’s good guys.
Shaun had a heart of gold, but his was a troubled life from a young age.
Yet through the darkness of his passing, there is a light – one that shone bright on Sunday.
The Legends Game carried a special significance on the weekend, serving as a way to honour Shaun and direct the spotlight onto suicide prevention and mental health awareness among young people.
The day was held in partnership with Mindfull Australia, a suicide prevention charity founded by Shaun’s great friend, and former club-mate at the Cora Lynn Football Netball Club, Matt Runnalls.
Mindfull’s purpose is to encourage those affected by mental health battles to come out of the shadows of stigma through self-acceptance and education of the wider community.
At the time he founded Mindfull, Matt was a 24-year-old tradie who played country footy. He had no real financial worries, his professional life was in order, and he had a strong network of family and friends.
But since he was 17, he battled severe anxiety and depression, which led to several suicide attempts. Between the ages of 12 and 25, he’d also lost six mates to suicide.
On Sunday, the teams which took to the field for the Legends Game were made up largely of Shaun’s mates and it was only fitting that the final result was a draw.
Following the game, there was a dinner and presentation in the clubrooms from both Matt, and Shaun’s mum Bec.
“If you could take a positive out of such a horrific situation, it was losing that second mate to suicide that enabled me to go and get the help and treatment that I required because I was so scared I’d be the next statistic,” Matt told the room.
“For anyone who knew me growing up, I was very similar to Shaun – I was a smart alec, confident, bubbly, and I couldn’t understand how life could get so bad.
“I want everyone in the room to do me one solid – remember those we’ve lost by their smile, their laugh, their humour, and in Shaun’s case his shit jokes. Remember not to associate the word suicide with them or remember them by their struggle. I know I’m damn lucky and forever grateful I was part of those six mates of mine’s lives.
“Only by coming together in unity do we have the chance to bring change and ensure nobody else travels their journey alone and lives a life debilitated and exhausted by their thoughts and feelings.
“I fight this brain-pain tooth and nail every day, and I won’t tell you that it’s easy because it’s not. But I will reiterate that it’s so worthwhile. You’re loved, you’re worthwhile, you’re unique, and I love that. Be here tomorrow.”
Bec thanked both the Redbacks and Mindfull for holding Sunday’s event in Shaun’s honour.
“It eases the pain slightly knowing that Shaun touched so many people’s hearts in his short 22 years, and was loved by so many people,” she said.
“Footy was the one thing Shaun looked forward to every week. It was the one time he could completely lose himself and forget about the pain and free his mind.
“Most of you knew him as a happy-go-lucky young man with a wicked sense of humour who was always the joker. You got to see the most amazing side of our boy – his enormous heart and soul, his humour, and laughter.”
Bec said if there was one positive to come out of losing Shaun, it was the determination and drive she gained to help anybody with their battles with mental illness and to try and prevent anyone going through the grief that she endures daily.
“The one thing I can say to each and every one of you is to hug your kids and tell them you love them every single day,” she said.
“Life is not guaranteed, and life is short. Look after your kids and if you sense something isn’t right, push and fight to find the answers.
“If anyone is out there suffering alone, please speak up, please seek help, and never be ashamed of asking for it or expressing how you feel.”
Anyone needing help can contact Lifeline on 13 11 14, beyondblue on 1300 22 4636, or Mindfull at www.facebook.com/mindfullaus.
